The Night I Almost Left You
by BollyKnickerElastic
Summary: Set on the night of the Queen Vic fire. Looking at the incident from the POV of Christian and Syed. How does the tragedy affect the couple and will past events rear their ugly head? Chryed.
1. Chapter 1

**The night I almost left you**

**Set on the night of the Queen Vic fire. Looking at the incident from the POV of Christian and Syed; how does the tragedy affect them as a couple and will past events rear their ugly head?**

**Dedicated to Holly and Jemma.**

Christian stood in the shower with his eyes closed as he let the stream of hot water bounce off his cold and aching skin. He reached up and turned the dial to full power, allowing the pressure of the water to beat the tension out of his chest. It had been a long, hard day with several regular clients and one impromptu induction with a middle-aged bloke called Pete, whose last exercise programme had quite apparently gone out with the soda stream. He had spent the last hour clock-watching, desperate to get home so he could shower, change and head to the Vic where his beloved Syed would be waiting for him.

As he stepped out and wrapped a towel around his waist, Christian smiled as he felt that all too familiar fluttery sensation in his stomach. They'd been together for a couple of months now, but he still missed him when he left for work and always got butterflies in anticipation of their meetings.

He finished buttoning up his jeans and took the towel from around his shoulders, ruffling his hair dry. As he rummaged through his wardrobe, pondering which shirt would look best; the silence of the flat was disrupted by the vibrating of his phone on the bedside table. He looked towards the disturbance and deliberated momentarily.

"_Leave it"_ he thought "_It'll only be Sy wondering where I am. It'll be a nicer surprise if I just turn up". _

Returning to the closet, he selected two shirts and stood with one in each hand, scrunching his face and rocking his head back and forth between the two. Eventually he lifted one shirt high up in to the air and acknowledged it.

"_Yes." _His head nodded in approval and a mischievous grin broke out on his face. _"This'll do the trick!"_

He put on the shirt, leaving the top two buttons undone and dressed his exposed chest with a splash of Paul Sebastian. It was the cologne Syed had bought him last Christmas and he only ever wore it on special occasions… or when he really wanted to turn him on. As he patted his jeans pockets and looked around for his wallet, the buzzing noise reverberated from his phone. Christian rolled his eyes and beamed at the thought of his man impatiently trying to get hold of him, despite having only been apart for a few hours.

He flung himself on to the bed and grasped at the handset, cackling as he answered.

"_Easy tiger, I'm on my way!" _

"_Christian?"_

"…_Jane?"_

"_Christian, where the hell have you been? I've been trying to get hold of you!"_

Jane's voice croaked through the presence of tears and each word she spoke was smothered with panic. As all matter of thoughts raced through Christian's bewildered mind, a wave of dread surged through his chest and his guts began to burn.

"_Christian? Are you there?"_

Had something happened to mum? Dad? Had Lucy been up to her old tricks; was Bobby ok? He hated not knowing, yet couldn't muster the courage to ask; because he had the feeling the answer wouldn't be something he wanted to hear.

"_Christian, there's been a fire!"_

A fire? What was she talking about? Christian could hear the words, but couldn't understand them. His head furrowed and his mouth opened, taking in a breath of air as he searched for something to say, but the words just wouldn't come.

"_Can you hear me Christian? There's been a fire… in the Vic_"

In the Vic. Those three words resonated through Christian's mind and images of Syed flickered before his eyes. As Jane's words echoed around his psyche, the hairs on his neck stood on end and he suddenly began to feel very cold.

"_Wh… What are you talking about?"_ the words stuttered out of him.

"_Christian, listen to me ok? There's been a fire in the Vic, a bad one_."

As Jane continued Christian detected pandemonium ensuing in the background. He could hear what sounded like female screams and an almighty crash, which startled him and forced a shudder.

"_It's ok, the fire brigade are here and they're getting everyone out, but it's…"_

"_Sy_…"

"_It's ok, Syed's out, he's safe… but he is hurt… and I'm scared Christian…"_ Jane's voice broke and she continued talking through tears _"…and I think we could both really do with you being here_"

Christian had already leapt to his feet and was holding his phone to his ear via his shoulder, as he flustered with his jacket. His clammy hands were struggling and the more panic-stricken he became, the closer he was to losing his patience. Pocketing his front door keys, Christian took hold of the receiver and answered bluntly,

"_I'm on my way_."

**Thanks for reading this chapter. I hope you enjoyed it. Please feel free to leave a review :-)  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 **

Christian hurried down the stairs and missed his footing as he went, managing to keep himself upright by slamming his arm in to the wall. He instantaneously regained his balance and carried on, unaware of the throbbing in his battered limb. His heart was pounding profusely in a way that ricocheted though his rib-cage and all he wanted to do was be sick.

In the instant that he stepped out in to the harsh night air, his nasal cavity became engulfed by the strong scent of burning and the situation suddenly felt real. He replayed the telephone conversation in his mind over and over again, picking apart the words that reverberated within him.

_Syed… safe… hurt… scared. _

Christian reached the top end of the market and caught sight of the old brick building in the distance. Brilliant flashes of orange were erupting from it and thick plumes of black smoke transcended in to the night sky. He stopped in his tracks, gasping at the enormity of the situation. As his eyes darted amongst the spectacle, an overwhelming feeling of weakness embodied his knees and his legs started to buckle from under him. Clinging on to the cold, metal piping that belonged to the adjacent pitch, Christian raised his free hand to cover his mouth and spoke introspectively through his fingers.

"_Oh my God_."

As he stood there motionless, Christian was caught in two minds as to what he should do next. He desperately wanted to run to the square and find Syed; to tell him he was there now and that everything would be ok, but for perhaps the first time in his life, Christian suddenly felt rather helpless. His newfound vulnerability struck him a heavy blow and he slumped defeated to the floor.

* * *

Syed was sat on the cold, damp pavement with his back up against the Beale's stone wall. As he stared intently at the ensuing fire, the raging flames reflected in his wide eyes and the haunting screams from the upstairs window shook through him. The hairs on his exposed forearms became erect and he hugged himself; clutching tightly to the fabric of his shirt in an attempt to stop himself from shivering. Jane could detect his frailty and knelt down beside him, offering an arm around his trembling shoulder.

"_Where is he?" _

Syed rocked back and forth and spoke in a manner that reminded Jane of Bobby at bedtime; scared of the monsters that lurked beneath his bed.

"_I've called him, he's on his way. He'll be here any minute_!"

Jane spoke with an air of optimism that she feared might be misplaced. It must have been a good ten minutes since she had called Christian, yet there was still no sign. She stood up and took a few paces away from Syed hoping to get a better view down Turpin Road. The place was streaming with frightened and disorientated people, many crying, others on their mobiles and some simply standing, frozen in awe. She spotted a tall, muscular figure in a black jacket and called out after him.

"_Christian?"_

She pushed her way through the hoards of people and grabbed at the man's shoulder.

"_Christian!"_

The man spun around and met her with a confused and irritated look. Jane's cheery façade faltered as she realised her mistake and she apologised profusely.

"_Oh I'm sorry; I thought you were someone else_."

She turned back and looked at Syed, who was now visibly shaking on the floor and his usually faultless complexion was weary and sallow. She felt the blood pressure rise in her chest and let out a sharp, angry breath.

"_Where the hell are you?"_

_

* * *

_Christian managed to drag himself off the floor, shutting his eyes tightly as a wave of dizziness washed warmly across his forehead. As he waited for the phenomenon to pass, he thought he heard his name being called and looked towards the blaze. He searched through the crowds for the voice, but the host of different pitches fought against each other and it was difficult to detect where it was coming from.

Christian saw an embracing couple walking towards him. He watched concertedly as they ambled past, noticing the blend of anguish and relief etched over their faces. He took a deep breath and felt himself come back to life; adrenaline jerking through his chest and thunder-bolting down his arms. As he began to dart his way through the swarms of residents and passers-by, Christian broke out in to a jog managing to elbow his way between gawping onlookers who were packed together and gossiping in a manner reminiscent of the witch burnings. He was filled with shame thinking of his earlier weakness and was now more determined than ever to hold himself together and find Syed.

Syed wasn't a weak person, Christian knew this, but he was connected to his emotions. It was something Christian appreciated and sometimes envied about him and it was one of the many reasons he loved him so much. Before Syed, Christian had never enjoyed talking about how he "felt", but Syed had brought that out of him. He was trying to imagine how Syed would be feeling right now; upset obviously and undoubtedly shocked and probably happy to still be alive. He didn't know how this experience would affect Syed in the long-term, but Christian did know that once he found him, he wanted to hold him tight and never let him go.

As Syed sat frozen to the spot, he began to feel disorientated, struggling to understand what had happened. He found himself watching the situation unfold as if from somebody else's perspective, not knowing what was real and what was the figment of his fraught imagination. He desperately urged his limbs to move, but couldn't muster the strength from within his weary bones. As he scanned the scene, Syed caught sight of the hoards of fire-fighters, paramedics and police that surrounded him and wondered just how it was possible for him to feel so utterly alone. He fought back the tears that were now welling up in his eyes and pulled his legs tightly in to his chest, resting his chin upon his knees.

"_Sy!"_

It took a few moments for the voice to register in Syed's brain. Eventually his eyes flickered back to life and his gaze lifted up off of the floor. He laughed through a relieved exhalation and tentatively reached out a shaking hand. Christian rushed forwards and took a firm hold of it; pulling Syed protectively to his feet and in to his inviting chest, wrapping his strong, reassuring arms around him tightly. Syed clung to him desperately and finally allowed himself to break down in a comforting flood of tears.

Christian slowly rocked them both side to side and hushed the broken man in his arms.

"_Shh… Shh… It's ok Sy, I'm here_"

The words, meant to comfort Syed, only served to make him cry harder as he appreciated just how lucky he was to have this wonderful man in his life. He attempted to speak, although his words were muffled by the fabric of Christian's clothes.

"_I was so scared Christian! I thought… I was going to… "_

As Syed continued to sob, Christian closed his eyes tightly and snuggled in to his dishevelled hair, finding comfort in its scent. In that moment, they were the only two people in the world. Everything around them disappeared and the only sound that passed between them came from their beating hearts.

After a few minutes, the night's events took their toll on Syed who began to dither uncontrollably. Christian pulled back from their embrace and removed his jacket purposefully, wrapping it around Syed's shoulders.

"_Come on. Let's get you home_"

**Thank you for reading. I really hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please feel free to leave a review :-)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

The two men had just got back to the flat following their brief walk home in the harsh, ash-strewn air. Christian manoeuvred Syed on to the settee and grabbed the woollen comforter off of their bed to put around him.

"_Oh look at you; you're shaking like a leaf! Here… I'll put the kettle on. What d'ya fancy? Tea… coffee… hot chocolate?"_

Christian was speaking in that upbeat tone that he used when he wanted to appear strong on the outside, but was actually terrified on the inside. Syed let out a comforting sigh as the weight from the blanket smothered him with warmth.

"_I don't mind…"_

The words were barely audible, but Christian began busily clattering away with spoons and mugs, relieved to have something productive to do. The flat was filled with an awkward silence that made Christian shudder with discomfort and absent-mindedly he began to whistle through the tension. Picking up the brimming mugs of cocoa, he walked over to the lounge area and placed them down on to the coffee table, opting to sit on the adjacent sofa rather than next to Syed.

"_There we are, that'll warm your cockles!"_

Syed managed to curl his lips in to a pensive smile, but couldn't quite manage to fix his eyes on Christian.

"_Thanks_"

The hush that fell on them was almost crippling and Christian couldn't help but furrow his brow as he questioned the change in mood. He pursed his lips as he contemplated his next move. Maybe he should just carry on as though everything was ok; start chatting about work or the disastrous run-in he'd had with Zainab earlier. Or maybe he should move to sit next to Syed and hold him and comfort him. He wasn't sure what exactly, but something was stopping him from doing any of these things. Instead he drew a breath and leant forward, clutching his hands together and staring at them as he spoke seriously.

"_Is everything alright Sy? Well, I mean, obviously not alright, I just… you seem a bit upset… not that you shouldn't be upset, you've been in a fire! I just…. oh God I'm such an idiot…" _

Seeing Christian struggling with his words, Syed sat up and leant forward, trying desperately to regain their lost eye-contact.

"_No! No, you're not an idiot Christian, that's me! I'm the idiot_."

Christian anxiously moved his gaze from his clasped hands and allowed them to flicker over Syed's arms, neck and face, until their eyes finally locked. As he searched Syed's eyes for a hint of reasoning, Christian detected a sorrow that he hadn't seen there in a long time and it worried him. Sensing Christian's concern, Syed quickly took hold of one of his hands, squeezed it and forced a reassuring smile.

"_You haven't done anything wrong, Christian. You've been amazing tonight. Really amazing."_

Christian wasn't sure if he truly believed them, but the words struck a chord in his heart and he felt himself more at ease.

"_I should have got there sooner; I can't imagine how scared you must have been"_

Syed eyes dropped and he pulled his hand away from Christian's. He wrapped his palms around the mug in front of him and allowed it to warm his hands as he took small, deliberate sips. Replacing the vessel on its coaster, Syed took a deep breath and gulped through the lump in his throat.

"_It's just tonight… the fire… not knowing if I was going to get out alive… it was so scary…"_

Christian's eyes began to well up as he sat and listened to Syed's vulnerable voice. He went to lift himself up off his chair to go and console his man, but Syed shook his head vehemently and pushed him away.

"_No Christian, please. I need to tell you this_."

Christian nodded understandingly and returned to the sofa, taking hold of the embroidered cushion that lay next to him and hugging it gently. Syed's facial expression thanked Christian and he continued where he had left off.

"_In the Vic, I got knocked to the floor… and everyone was rushing around… and panicking… and I was getting trampled on… and all the time I was just thinking about how much I didn't want to die_"

The tears that had threatened now came streaming down Christian's face and his insides began to hurt. He tried desperately to blink them back as Syed continued.

"_I kept thinking, what if this is it? What if this is me done? What if I die… and I never get to say goodbye to Christian_."

Christian's silent tears turned in to an audible sob and as he hugged the cushion tightly in to his chest, he could feel his heart pumping through it.

"_There's so many things we haven't talked about; so many things that I need to explain. And I know why we haven't, because we're together now… and happy… but these things, Christian… they need to be said."_

As realisation dawned on him, Christian began to get that hot, sick phenomenon in his stomach. Their history had been tarnished with many mistakes and regrets, but Christian being Christian didn't want to acknowledge them. As far as he was concerned, they were the past and he and Syed should just be happy with their present, but there was inevitability in Syed's voice tonight that told Christian he couldn't put it off any longer.

"_Being in that fire… it made me think of… that night_."

Christian's face became etched with confusion and his grip on the cushion loosened as he questioned Syed's choice of words.

"_What night?"_

Syed's head shrunk in to his chest as his brain nagged him with shame and he started to wish they didn't need to have this conversation; but he knew they did.

"_The night…"_

Syed cleared his throat purposefully and braced himself with a sharp inhalation.

"_The night… I almost left you."_

The two men looked at each other, but didn't utter another word. They didn't need too; they both knew exactly what Syed was talking about. Christian took a large gulp from his lukewarm cocoa and winced as the bitterness hit his stomach.

"_I just feel like I need to explain what I did… and why I did it, because I don't want you thinking the wrong things."_

"_You tried to kill yourself, Sy!"_

Christian's tone was more abrupt than he had anticipated and Syed was visibly taken aback by his outburst. He didn't like Christian snapping at him like that, but at the same time he understood it.

"_I know that's what you think, but it wasn't like that… not really…"_

"_Then what was it like?"_

Christian's pitch was softer now and his kind eyes urged Syed to continue.

"_Well for a start, it wasn't premeditated. I didn't buy the vodka and the pills thinking, this is it, this is my way out! I was just so… lost. But I didn't want to die, not really, I know that now!"_

Christian's face creased with puzzlement.

"_Why now?"_

Syed smiled weakly, yet knowingly and reached his hand over to Christian, placing it softly on his thigh.

"_Because tonight, when I was in that fire and wondering if I would ever get to see you again, speak to you again, touch you or taste you again, I got the exact same feeling as on that night… and it made me realise that it wasn't that I wanted to die at all… I just didn't want to live… if it was without you."_

Christian gritted his teeth in a vain attempt to stop further tears rolling and placed his hand on top of Syed's; squeezing it in a way that spoke the words he couldn't find the courage to utter.

**Thanks for reading this chapter. I hope you enjoyed it. Please feel free to leave a review :-)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

"_It was my fault."_

Syed looked at Christian in astonishment and shook his head, opening his mouth as he searched for a response.

"_Why would you think that?"_

"_Because I pushed you. Sy. I always did do, but that time, with the wallpaper and Amira and your family… I pushed you too far… and if it wasn't for me none of this would have happened."_

Syed sat motionless in his place, the blanket that had been wrapped around him now lay at his feet. He looked down at the half drunk, cold cocoa that had now formed a skin and begged his brain to think of the right thing to say.

"_Being with Amira… it was like being on an express train… going along for a ride I wasn't supposed to be on. I never actually thought we'd get married_."

"_What did you think was going to happen after you proposed?"_

The retort cut through Syed's side like a rapier. He hated himself for doing that to Christian. If truth be told, it was probably the worst thing he ever did to him, because without it, none of the other nasty stuff would have had to happen.

"_I don't know… I suppose it just seemed like such a long time until the wedding and I kept thinking something would come along to stop it_."

Christian had to bite his tongue to stop himself from screaming "_what about me?" _Instead he pulled himself to his feet and walked over to the window, squinting at the orange glow that came in from the street light. He breathed smoothly and looked on contemplatively and his nose twitched with the scent of the condensation.

"_I always got it you know; you and Amira. Why you stayed with her and couldn't tell her the truth. I got it, even though I couldn't comprehend it… and if I thought you could have been genuinely happy with her, I would have let you go."_

Syed turned round to face Christian. As he stood by the window, he cut a lonely figure and it took all of Syed's strength not to go over and kiss him right then.

"_Funny thing is I actually quite liked Amira. I mean yeah, she could be immature… and superficial… and really annoying when she called me her 'Franck', but she was kinda sweet, you know. I never wanted to hurt her… and I definitely never wanted to hurt you."_

As Christian said those last few words, he turned to face Syed. His face was stained with old tears and his eyes were filled with genuine remorse for the heartache he felt he had caused.

"_All I ever wanted Sy… all I will ever want… is for you, Syed Masood, to be the happiest version of yourself you can be_ _and anything I have ever done, good, bad or indifferent, I did with your best interests at heart_."

Syed gasped silently as he felt his heart flutter in a way that almost knocked him too the floor. He couldn't recall anybody ever saying anything as beautiful to him in his entire existence. Christian's past actions became remarkably clear and Syed suddenly felt his insides pang with guilt.

"_I'm so sorry Christian. I'm so sorry that I couldn't be true to myself, even after everyone found out about us_."

Christian pulled a chair out from underneath the dining table and sat down heavily, with a look of dejection on his face.

"_I… reject… him_."

Christian whispered the words and as he did so, felt the same earth-shattering blow in his guts that he had felt on that night. He continued to stare blankly in to the table, tracing his fingers around the knots and along the patternations of the wood.

"_I shouldn't have said that."_

Christian nodded his head and pursed his lips.

"_I understand why you did though. I mean… all you had were ashes_."

He lifted his head up and looked directly at Syed, whose expression was now drooping with melancholy.

"_That's all I'd left you with."_

Syed stood up and walked resolutely towards Christian, taking his upper arms in his hands and seizing them tightly.

"_That's all I was left with, because of me! Because of my own stupidity… and ignorance… and self-defiance; not because of you!"_

As he grasped even tighter on to his arms, Syed leant in so that his face was within a few centimetres of Christian's and made his voice stern.

"_You were offering me everything I had ever wanted on a plate, and I still chose not to take it… and the things I did to you that night… the things I said… in front of everybody… I will never forgive myself for that_."

The realisation that the other had been harbouring these feelings of guilt and blame for so long, dawned on both men and while words continued to escape them it felt right to embrace. Syed wrapped one arm around Christian's back and held his head tightly in the other and instinctively, they both said,

"_I'm sorry."_

_

* * *

_Syed had poured himself a glass of milk and returned to the settees where Christian was now sitting. As he contemplated momentarily where to put himself, Christian patted the space next to him and smiled reassuringly. As Syed took his seat, Christian placed his hand on his thigh and stroked it lovingly with his thumb. It was the most comfortable either man had felt since returning home and in that moment an air of contentment and calm descended on to them.

"_I'm sorry, Sy. I was so selfish; I didn't think about the repercussions of what I was doing, I just did them, because I thought it was for the best_."

Syed placed his hand on top of Christian's and interlaced his fingers with his.

"_I know!"_

Syed spoke pleadingly; desperate for Christian to believe his words.

"_Christian, listen to me. I don't have anything but good thoughts and feelings when it comes to you. All of the stuff that you're on about… my family… my community… Amira… they all hate me, because of me and my actions. I understand that every single thing you did, was because you loved me and unlike everyone else, actually cared about me being happy. You're the only person, who has ever made me feel like I counted… like I mattered. _"

Christian smiled at the analogy and lifted his hand to Syed's face, brushing his fingers across his cheek and through his bedraggled hair. He had never imagined being able to love something so much, and to have him love him back felt like the most wonderful thing in the world.

"_Now I don't have a single ounce of bitterness towards you, Christian; all I have is love. And all of those things that happened between us… all of the pain… and the tears… and the heartbreak; I don't regret any of it, because all it's done is make me appreciate you even more." _

Christian's eyes melted in to Syed as he spoke and he felt his heart reignite; fluttering in a way that warmed his previously cold soul.

"_It's our history, Christian and without it, we wouldn't be where we are today."_

Christian's brow furrowed and his tone became breathy and serious, as it tended to when he was concerned.

"_But you've had to give up so much, Sy"_

Syed shook his head and laughed through an exasperated sigh,

"_They gave me up! And until they decide to change, there's absolutely nothing I can do to make them understand… and yes, it's a sad situation, and yes there are times my heart breaks when I think I might never be a part of my family again… might never get to see my brother grow up… but it has to be this way. I can't not be myself any more." _

Syed moved closer to Christian and rested his hands on either side of his face, finding the coarseness of his stubble oddly comforting.

"_Now I've come to terms with that and I can live without being a part of them… but being in that fire tonight and feeling like you were slipping away from me… well that made me realise that I can't live without being a part of you… of us."_

He used his hands to pull Christian's face gently towards him and delicately pressed their lips together with the lightest of barely-there touches. The hairs on the back of Christian's neck stood on end and his bottom lip quivered with expectation…

**Thanks for reading this penultimate chapter; I really hope you're enjoying the story. Please feel free to leave a review :-) **


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5. **

**This chapter is dedicated to all of the people at WFCTGIO. It's been a pleasure chatting with you all. Really hope you've enjoyed the story :-) **

For a moment, both men hesitated and parted their faces just enough for their eyes to come in to focus. Christian's gaze flickered up over Syed's forehead and around his jagged hairline, dropping exploratively down his slender cheekbones and along his stubble-strewn jaw; eventually reaching his parted mouth. Syed tentatively licked his bottom lip, creating a rosy glisten to it that made him look all the more inviting.

Christian cautiously lifted his hand up to Syed's face, tracing its contours with his delicate touch. He moved his fingers along Syed's neck and down over his slender chest, bobbling over the protruding buttons on his black, blemished shirt. He leant in with purpose and groaned inwardly as he kissed Syed and experienced the soft warmth of his lips. As their clinch became deeper, Syed inhaled sharply and allowed his body to melt in to Christian's, who reached his arms around Syed's waist and pulled him in tightly.

"_Ow!" _

Syed winced and pulled away from their embrace, grimacing as he reached his hand around to clasp his lower back.

"_What's the matter… what did I do?"_

Syed shook his head and clenched his jaw through the pain. He shifted uncomfortably on the settee and slowly opened his eyes as the greatest of the pain subsided.

"_My back… I got a bit of a kicking while I was on the floor… It's nothing really."_

Christian frowned as he sensed Syed acting the martyr and ushered him to stand up with a movement of his hands.

"_It's fine, Christian… really." _

Christian stood strappingly with hands on hips and reached out his hand to Syed, who was sinking in to the sofa and trying to avert his attention elsewhere.

"_Well it obviously is something; otherwise you wouldn't be in pain, now up!" _

Syed grudgingly took Christian's hand and rolled his eyes in protest, all the while beaming inside at his boyfriend's firm and considerate tone. Christian pulled Syed gently to his feet and lifted the bottom of his shirt upwards.

"_It's no good, I think it needs to come off altogether."_

Christian grinned naughtily and started to loosen the buttons seductively, never taking his eyes off Syed. Once the entirety of his torso was exposed, Christian slowly smoothed the fabric over Syed's shoulders and let the article drop to the floor; taking his upper arms and turning him around. As he examined Syed's willowy back, Christian let out an audible gasp at the sight of a shoe-print shaped bruise that extended along his lower ribs and deep in to the valley of his waist.

"_My God, Sy; look at you!" _

Syed felt awkward at being gawped at and shivered as the cold air hit his bare flesh. Sensing his discomfort, Christian removed his own t-shirt and walked towards him allowing his chest to press tantalizingly against Syed's shoulders. He moved a small section of Syed's hair to expose his neck and swooped in, kissing it firmly but with affection rather than lust. As his fingers continued to wrap themselves around Syed's hair, Christian worked his mouth slowly in between Syed's shoulder blades and down his spine, allowing his lips to search every inch of his skin.

Syed hissed as he sucked a breath of air in through his teeth and shook slightly as Christian breathed softly in to the small of his back. Christian's kisses became more and more delicate the further down Syed's back he got, until his bottom lip was breathily brushing over the already blackening bruise, like a feather. Syed clutched his thigh and flung his head back through the mixture of pleasure and pain and instinctively his breathing accelerated.

Christian, now kneeling, reached his arms around Syed's waist and pulled at the leather strap of his belt, undoing it in a single tug. Syed unconsciously began unbuttoning his jeans, shuffling them down towards his ankles and turning as he stepped out of them. Christian rose hesitantly; the space between them filled with a silence that couldn't be more dissimilar to the one that had encapsulated them earlier.

As Syed looked longingly at Christian, something overtook him and he kissed him firmly, dipping his tongue in and out with the tempo of their embrace. As they continued to kiss, passionately but with restraint, Syed felt behind him and switched off the only lamp that illuminated the room. He took Christian's hand and led him soundlessly to their bed.

"_Sy…"_

Syed raised his finger to his mouth and hushed Christian. As they sat on the edge of the bed, Christian felt a wonderful strangeness shudder through him, as he felt turned on in a way that he never had before. Syed picked up Christian's hand and tenderly kissed each of his fingers, closing his eyes and murmuring as he captured the scent of his clean, fragrant skin.

"_Mmm…" _

Christian moved a piece of hair from out of Syed's eyes, allowing the moonlight that flooded brilliantly through the window to hit them like a spotlight and he felt as though he could see deep down in to his boyfriend's soul. Syed manoeuvred himself on to his back and Christian lay next to him, propping himself up on his elbow. As they explored each other fully and their bodies became one, they sunk heavenly in to a joyous oblivion.

* * *

As Christian's body rose and fell rhythmically, miniscule beads of infatuation-laden sweat ran along the lines of his tightly-defined body. Syed reached his trembling hand around the edge of the mattress and clutched it forcefully, arching his back to allow the exhilaration bubbling up inside of him to shake through his vertebrae. The only sound that echoed between their two yearning bodies coming from the ebbing and flowing of their frantic breaths. Christian's elbows stuttered as his head pounded with intensifying ecstasy and once the gratification surging through him became too insane, his arms buckled from under him and his heavy chest collapsed on top of Syed; their perspiration holding them together like glue.

The force of Christian's body resting upon him took Syed's breath away, forcing him to tilt his head back and gasp for air. Christian's muscular torso slid against his own and Syed could feel his warm breath against his neck. He closed his eyes tightly as he tried desperately to control the now overwhelming sensations careering through his tense thighs and up in to his abdomen.

Christian's movements became quicker and less relenting as he burrowed his head in to the space between Syed's face and the pillow; groaning in to it as not to break the haunting silence enveloping them. Syed reached his hand around to claw his finger tips firmly down Christian's back, digging in with enough pressure to elicit a groan of pain from within him. Their two bodies were now moving rapidly in unison and as he teetered on the edge, Christian bit sharply in to Syed's shoulder, mopping up the smallest droplet of blood with his hungry tongue. Each man started to shudder intensely and their breaths became shallower and less needy as the oxygen-deprivation in their brains forced the most unimaginable electric shock throughout their beings. Both of their bodies seized up and momentarily they ceased to breathe, so that in the dimly moonlit shadows, they appeared as lovestruck cadavers.

* * *

After a few moments, their bodies relaxed as the tension slowly seeped out of them and Christian was finally free to lift his head out of the pillow where it had been hiding. He looked for Syed, whose face was slumped to the opposite side of the bed and taking his chin in his fingertips, pulled his head round to make eye contact with him. As he did this, Christian noticed a teardrop resting on his boyfriend's cheek and a look of embarrassment in his eyes. Using his thumb, Christian swept away the tear and kissed the skin where it had been resting. He moved just a short distance away from Syed's face and looking directly in to his misty eyes, smiled and whispered the truest thing he had ever said,

"_You are so beautiful."_

** Thanks very much for reading my story. Please feel free to leave review!  
**


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